9 May 2013


Recently, my friend told me a story about Chopper.

Chopper, as you may imagine, chops things. As far as the patient can pay, he can chop off anything. Over the years, he has chopped many cancers, but he has also chopped off countless normal body parts. Now, if you persuaded a patient to undergo surgery but the resection specimen turned out to be normal, you would probably blush and wonder how to explain. But not Chopper. He would just knock on the door with a radiant smile and trumpet with his baritone voice, “Congratulations, madam! There was nothing but normal tissue. It was not cancer. You don’t need to worry now.” Time and again, the patient would thank him wholeheartedly, eyes filled with tears.

Last year, a high-ranking official from the Whirlpool Galaxy travelled to Earth. He had cancers spread everywhere. No healer from his galaxy could offer any cure. Chopper was undeterred. “I can chop off your airbags and the oncologists can then take care of the smaller tumors,” he explained.

The official could not live without airbags and died shortly after the chopping procedure. Furious, a group of Whirlpoolers grabbed Chopper and planned to burn him in M51. As luck would have it, Charles Messier learned about the operation and rescued Chopper from the Whirlpoolers. That said, Chopper’s eyes were burnt by the scorching flame of the Sun. If you come across him, you may still see him wearing a pair of extra-large sunglasses.

1 comment:

  1. Dr. Wong, that's a hilarious way of describing a very awful story!
    I remember working under Chopper as an intern, and I was told by previous interns before me that I would have to be prepared to prescribe for his private patients using HA coding, so that his patients could skimp on private prescription fees. Luckily he never did ask me, as by that time, he was leaving HA for good.... I would not have been able to keep my big mouth for sure.
    I'm glad justice came finally ; )